1. so-personal:

    everything personal

    (Source: acidicmoons, via youreverydaycliche)


  2. Ranting it out

    I just want to cry. I feel awful. I have a sore throat. I’m sick of being and feeling sick. I’m sick of having to hold my nose. I’m sick of randomly crying. 

    I just can’t wait to be in the smoother part of pregnancy. Only reason why I am a bit sad about only being in the 9 week stage is that I now have to repsych myself up to getting to milestones of when sickness could be over. It’s gone up by 3 weeks.

    All I want is cuddles from Steven, but he is too far away. I haven’t seen him for ages due to him working and me being sick so much. We were suppose to be together tonight but had to cancel due to me feeling sick, having sore throat etc. No way could I have gone anywhere.


  3. Update

    Had my scan today and realised straight away that I wasn’t 12 weeks.

    I am about 9weeks and 2days, but will get new EDD at my next scan on 8th October.

    Littlie had a really strong and clear heartbeat and was strange to hear and see on a screen. There is a baby growing inside me! This is real and not pretend!


  4. Yay being sick in the garden in the dark, because you know you can’t make it to the toilet. Oh the joys


  6. Ask Me Things! :) (For baby, wttc, ttc, mumblr, etc. blogs)

    1. 1.) How old are you?
    2. 2.) Have you always wanted to have kids?
    3. 3.) Do you have kids?
    4. 4.) If so, what are their names/ages?
    5. 5.) Are you pro-circumcision or against it? Why or why not?
    6. 7.) Do you approve of baby piercing? Why or why not?
    7. 8.) Do you have a SO? (significant other)
    8. 9.) Are you wttc or ttc?
    9. 10.) Opinion on co-sleeping?
    10. 11.) Opinion on baby wearing?
    11. 12.) How many kids do you want?
    12. 13.) What genders?
    13. 14.) Have you thought of names yet?
    14. 15.) Vaginal birth or C-Section?
    15. 16.) Cloth diapers or disposable?
    16. 17.) Are you ready to be a parent right now?
    17. 18.) Are you on any birth control?
    18. 19.) Will you let your kids watch tv or movies? (disney, baby einstein, sprout, etc.)
    19. 20.) How would you like to give birth?
    20. 21.) Have you planned a nursery?
    21. 22.) What were your cravings while pregnant?
    22. 23.) Have you bought any baby things yet?
    23. 24.) Do you use ovulation tests?
    24. 25.) Do you track cervical mucus?
    25. 26.) How long did it take you to get pregnant?
    26. 27.) If you're ttc, what are you looking forward to most when you get your BFP?
    27. 28.) Is there a month or a season you'd want the baby to be born in?
    28. 29.) Do your kids/will your kids have grandparents?
    29. 30.) Do you think you'll have an epidural, or will you be drug free?
    30. 31.) How long were you in labor?
    31. 32.) Did the baby come on due date?
    32. 33.) Will you vaccinate?
    33. 34.) What about medicating?
    34. 35.) Did you/will you have a baby shower?
    35. 36.) What about a gender reveal party?
    36. 37.) Home school? Public? Private? Charter? Boarding?
    37. 38.) Do you breastfeed, or do you plan too?
    38. 39.) Do you have any pets for baby to meet?
    39. 40.) Have you done any photoshoots, or do you plan to? (newborn, pregnancy/maternity, gender reveal, etc.)
    40. 41.) Will you be a SAHM/SAHD or will you work?
    41. 42.) Did you/do you have a hope chest?
    42. 43.) What is the best thing about being a parent?
    43. 44.) What is the best thing about WTTC?
    44. 45.) What is the best thing about TTC?
  7. (Source: intensional, via cringing)


  8. sorry but my farts since being pregnant are gross. With my sense of smell and morning sickness, is not a good combo


  9. I miss Steven so much. Been feeling really lonely. I want him around!


  10. I feel like eating coconut cake! mmmmm and/or cake and custard.

    Wait, wait! if i got off my lazy butt I could make cake and custard (just have to make up the custard)

    Buuuuut, I doubt it happening lol


  11. Domestic Violence

    I have the urge to speak to my ex step cousin. He literally saved my mums life approx 13/14 years ago. He was approx 14 years old himself.

    It was Christmas. Both me and my brother were away. My mum was at home with her then partner who was also violent.
    They went to see his family. They all beat her. She had a head injury. When she got home his nephew also came inside. He was able to distract his uncle until my mum was out the house where she escaped to my neighbour who took her to the hospital. She knows for a fact that she would’ve died that night as the beatings would have continued.

    I remember coming back from my aunts. He met me at the station. He told me that my mum couldn’t come because she had ‘walked into a door’ and had a black eye.

    Another memory:

    I remember him dragging her out of MY bed. I was about 9 maybe. At that point we had to go. I remember him on his knees pleading with me for us to stay. I looked him in his face and told him no we are leaving. We walked up the hill to my mums friends house in our pyjamas.


    I remember when he was going off on one and we were in the living room. I was scared and was pretending to read a book. We were saved by his friend calling him to go out. And he went


    I remember when I was 11 and my mum had received a prank call. He then proceeded to question my brother who was 14 at the time. His friend our neighbour came. And my mums ex was getting in my brothers face.
    That was the night my mum knew we had to leave. My brother stayed at the neighbours house.
    The next morning we creeped around packing a bag. My mum was careful to pack one that was identical to my neighbours. It was then passed to her who then walked with it to the end of our road. It was a very windy day.
    Our first stop was to my mums friends a 5min walk away. Then we were off just my mum and me (my brother was going to my dads). We made the journey to Brighton where my cousin lived. I had to reassure my mum all the way to the station telling her we were doing the right thing. It was one of those days where there were delays because of fallen trees and leaves on the tracks. But we eventually made it. I had barely anything. My cousin bought me a coat.

    My dad refused to drive up to our road when picking my brother up. So my brother was forced to walk passed our house where the violent man was. This is something I will never forgive my dad for. Bare in mind my dad has no problems on handling himself as a bouncer an black belt in ju jit su.

    My uncle drove my mum and I back. When we got back he had gone. Takin everything of value. TV, stereo system etc. house looked very bare. But we were ok and we had left

    I would love to say that was the end of it. But the thing about domestic violence is that it is a very complex issue. Although he didn’t live with us and I have only ever seen him once in the street. It didn’t stop fully until I was about 14/15 maybe.

    I do not blame my mum for what happened one bit. It was not her fault. She protected my brother and I from it as much as possible (there’s lots I don’t know but bits have come out since)
    My mum is a strong and remarkable woman. I love her to pieces and we are very close.

    I don’t know why I wrote this but it was on my mind then I opened tumblr and saw about Janay Rice and my short post got longer.

    I was a witness to it and I have been lucky to say that my brain has blacked out a lot of what I saw to protect me.

    My mum was lucky. She could have died or she could have killed him as that is a true reality. If they can’t get away then someone usually dies. The victim or the perpetrator. Whoever gets there first.


  12. Caboo NCT

    I have been looking at slings lately. Even my mum has! I have decided on getting the Caboo NCT.

    I am not precious about getting brand new. So I have been looking on eBay and now watching a few different ones.

    I am so excited. I thought I wanted a sling like a moby. But after talking to my mum I decided that I wanted something that was simpler and required less work to use. The caboo NCT was the perfect alternative and fell in love as soon as I watched a quick tutorial for it.

    Definitely will help me clean and cook once baby is born. I can’t wait!


  13. mybabyfever:

    Like/reblog this if you’re pregnant, ttc, wttc, a mom, any of that and I’ll check out your blog. My dash has been pretty dead recently. And let me know if you’re due in December ‘cause I’d really like to meet more people who are due around the same time as me! :)


  14. A reality that I need to start thinking about is: when should I put myself on the housing list? And should I consider other boroughs/areas?

    My mum has said I can live at home until I am ready to live alone with my baby. But as we know getting a place can take a while.

    It is a scary but very real prospect that needs to be thought about and discussed. But ultimately, it will be my decision and down to me!


  15. I wonder what my baby will look like. Whether Littlie will be like Steven’s daughter and be ‘white’ in complexion or like my niece who has a little hint of brown or as dark as my nephew who simply looks half black and half white to the point that he’s darker than me.
    All are babies who have one mixed parent and one white parent.
    Steven thinks Littlie will be like his daughter, as he can’t imagine any different because her mother is darker than me.
    My brothers are also darker than me. But you never know with mixed babies.

    Littlie could also have blue eyes as I know there has to be a history on both sides. Steven has blue eyes and the connection for me is my mum who has very blue eyes and I have a lot of her genes.

    It seems so far away now as I am only 11 weeks. But I can’t wait to meet my baby, my Littlie.

    I am hoping for a boy.